Organizing in the office this morning of April 30th and found this:
So what is it w/ Dead Memories anyway?! Crap from the past that gets dredged up by some unknown/unrecognized trigger. Dead bullets to the brain that bring again the pain. Why?? What part of our DNA ties to them. What good did they serve our ancestors? And to such a degree that they linger today? Or did we develop the capacity for them. I understand fight/flight, but that is cutting edge/in your face/in the moment. No real thinking just reacting. Cave man stuff. Now that we are civilized did living easier bring time to dwell on past issues? Idle minds and all that.
Our minds are never really idle though so like the turn of a wheel everything comes to the surface in time. When the not-so-dead memories surface there must be a reason, an unresolved issue. Certainly a lesson to be learned.
It is easy in the morning light to dismiss them as bad dreams and look to the sun for a peachy day. But they were there and they will be back. Too bad when they do come around your/my/a person’s life is not in a position to allow them to be resolved. The rat race wheel spins fast so you better be running in the morning. Imagine taking the time to deal w/ the issues so they can be lain to rest as truly dead. Take that day off, a week, whatever it takes. It’s your life.
How many times will they surface again to cause you pain in little bites. Bites you cover w/ salve in the morning. Add up the many bites which equal hours of dis-ease, in all the years?? Bet it adds up to more than the time it would have taken to resolve.
But true resolve can be more painful than the many small bites. And take time. So we jump to the worlds schedule because it is easier. We schedule happy little vacations that usually cause more stress than they are worth but hey, it’s a vacation right? We all need that. Been busy racing rats and applying the salve. Two weeks off so I better have fun. Hurry up w/ another drink, I’m on vacation and don’t want to think.